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1、公司上周末在郊外组织放鸽子比赛，去了我才发现只有我一个人，感觉自己好单纯！
Last weekend, the company organized a pigeon competition in the suburbs. When
2、这么多年好像没什么长进，我还是那个一受委屈就想回家找妈妈的小辣鸡。
It seems that I haven"t made any progress for so many years. I"m still the one who wants to go home to find my mother"s garbage as soon as I"m wronged.
3、这年代这么多人纹身，就忍不住想了一下未来的夏天，一群有纹身的老头儿跟老太……
There are so many tattoos in these days, I can"t help thinking about the future summer, a group of tattooed old men and old women……
4、“发自拍以后听到什么最开心？”“和你本人比差远了。”
"What"s the happiest thing I"ve heard since I took a selfie?" "It"s far from you."
5、霸道总裁与流氓的区别，或许就是在亲女孩子的时候，她不会跑~
Perhaps the difference between a bully and a hooligan is that she can"t run when she kisses a girl~
6、心有多大，舞台就有多大。胃有多大，脸盘子就有多大。
The stage is as big as the heart. Your face is as big as your stomach.
7、村里本来有两个傻子，后来我打工回来，就成了三个，还多了个疯子！
There were two idiots in the village, but when I came back from work, I became three, and there were more lunatics!
8、送儿子上学的时候跟一个高中生吵架，一句：你哪个班的？让我瞬间原谅了他！
When I sent my son to school, I quarreled with a high school student, saying: which class are you in? Let me instantly forgive him!
9、如何高情商夸人脸大？应该说：你的脸应该很好打粉吧！
How to exaggerate the face with high EQ? Should say: your face should be very good powder it!
10、俗话说：是金子总会发光。但是看着这满地的金子，我都懵了~
As the saying goes: gold always shines. But looking at the gold all over the ground, I am confused~
11、有时候，很恨自己原则性太强。明明可以靠身材吃饭，却偏偏要用实力~
Sometimes, I hate myself for being too principled. You can eat by your figure, but you have to use your strength~
12、女人安慰女人，会说自己很惨；男人安慰男人，会说另外一个男人很惨~
If a woman comforts a woman, she will say that she is miserable; if a man comforts a man, she will say that another man is miserable~
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