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我能想到最浪漫的事就是：和你一起吃吃吃，然后你付钱你付钱你付钱。
The most romantic thing I can think of is: eat with you, and then you pay, you pay, you pay.
老师：“大家平时要耐心点，罗马也不是一天就建成的。”小明：“可老师每次布置作业，非要我们当天完成。”老师：“滚出去！”
Teacher: "everyone should be patient at ordinary times. Rome is not built in a day." Xiao Ming: "but every time the teacher assigns homework, we have to finish it the same day." Teacher: "get out!"
工作之后才发现，学校本来就不打算教会你什么，而是让你习惯以后每天要早起去上班，晚自习是提前让你，适应加班。
After work, I found that the school did not intend to teach you anything, but let you get used to getting up early and going to work every day. Late self-study is to let you adapt to overtime in advance.
姐缺钱吗？姐不缺。姐缺的是一个给姐钱花的男人。
Are you short of money? I don"t need it. What my sister lacks is a man who gives her money.
你要是玩够了就回来，我一直在等你打双排 。
Come back if you"ve had enough. I"ve been waiting for you to play double row.
打败我们的，从来，都不是生活，而是，生活费。
What defeated us was never life, but the cost of living.
回想这半辈子，当过最大的官也就是qq群管理员了。
Looking back on this half life, I have been the biggest official, that is, QQ group administrator.
学校有很多人谈恋爱，一天政教处主任来到我们教室：我长得丑不丑。全班静，然后他大吼一声：我长那么丑都找到老婆了，你们急什么！
Many people fell in love in the school. One day, the director of the political and educational department came to our classroom: am I ugly. The whole class was quiet, and then he shouted: I"m so ugly that I"ve found my wife. What"s your hurry!
有个问题第一的学霸未必能回答正确，而倒数第一的学渣一定知道，那就是全校一共有多少学生？
There is a question that the first Xueba may not be able to answer correctly, and the last Xueba must know, that is, how many students are there in the whole school?
生活会让你苦上一阵子。等你适应了之后。再苦上一辈子。
Life will make you suffer for a while. When you get used to it. Another life.
阻碍中国年轻人富起来的最大原因，就是总想犒劳一下自己。
The biggest reason that prevents Chinese young people from getting rich is that they always want to reward themselves.
最近总有人说我很可爱，我想了一个晚上没想通，究竟是谁走漏了风声。
Recently, some people always say I"m cute. I haven"t figured out who leaked the news all night.
富人的钱包像朵花，每次打开都让人满脸微笑，穷人的钱包就像洋葱，每次打开都直叫人泪流满面！
The rich man"s wallet is like a flower, which makes people smile every time he opens it, and the poor man"s wallet is like an onion, which makes people cry every time he opens it!
世界上最糟的感觉之一：睡眼懵懂醒过来看时间。结果发现三分钟后闹铃就会响，你想再睡一会，最后发现闹钟也没叫醒你。
One of the worst feelings in the world: sleepy eyes, wake up and look at the time. It turns out that the alarm will ring in three minutes. You want to sleep again. Finally, you find that the alarm clock didn"t wake you up.
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